The Man Whom I’ve Never Met Who Lives in a Tent and Inspires Me

So I like to ride my bike on these super secret trails in the city.  I promised the guy who built them that I would never divulge their location on the internet.  There are 3 sets of trails and there is a man living in a tent right smack in the middle of one of the sets of trails.  And because this trail has a small footprint, you ride by it 4 or 5 times from different angles.

The first time I saw the tent, I thought to myself, “neat – someone is camping so they can be right here on the trails.”  But then I realized that city camping in the woods is probably not the purpose of this tent.  Then I got nervous.  What if he was a serial killer hiding out and I had discovered him?  Well, that was crazy – there are far more remote places to hide out in the north Georgia mountains or in the rural flats south of the city.    “Hmmm, what is the story of this tent?”

I came back again during the week, expecting that the tent would be gone, but this was certainly not a weekend camper.  This guy was in it long-term.  And, he was cooking!  I could smell it.  Hmmm – I wondered . . . had his wife thrown him out?  Had he lost his job and was too ashamed to ask for help?  What did he do all day?

Two months later, the tent is still there.  He leaves no trash and no trace outside his tent, and he hangs his laundry neatly on the line.  He’s a boxers man . . . and a big guy from what I can tell.  He must hear the bikes whizz by his tent from different directions.  There are not too many of us who ride in there, but what does he think when he hears us?

The point is – I really don’t know this man’s story behind the things I can observe.   I can create any story I want to, and my story will determine how I feel about my tent friend when I’m out there on the trail.  So this is what I choose to think – here’s a guy, down on his luck . . . extremely resourceful, respectful of others, respectful of the environment, respectful of himself.  He’s doing what it takes to survive.  Maybe he enjoys the simpler life.  Maybe he likes having an oasis in the city.  I’ve never met him, but I like him.  He inspires me to be neater, kinder, simpler, more respectful and to enjoy each little oasis life brings.

Noticing my friend in the tent,

Bernadette

Stayworkation, Synchronicity and Living My Passions

How often are you able to say you had a fun week at home, working, playing and getting organized personally?  This week was definitely a fun one for me and an eye opener of positive changes in my life.

Business had picked up quite a bit in the past couple of months.  Our web and print design projects increased and we had some aggressive timelines for one of our virtual marketing department clients.  In fact, that client, Paws, Whiskers and Wags, determined that they needed full-time sales and marketing leadership, and I decided to step into that role starting Nov. 1.

I knew it was a workable solution because Natural Marketing had become more of a marketing communications firm over the past year anyway.  Matt was ready to jump back into more of the business development efforts, and we had various synchronicity moments that indicated this was the good step for me, Paws, Whiskers and Wags, and for Natural Marketing.  Don’t you love it when several plans come together?

Fast forward to this week.  Knowing things were coming down to the wire for the transition, I was concerned about getting everything done and being in a rested/prepared state of mind for all the changes.

This week ended up being a great mix of personal preparation, and enjoying a little “staycation” time with Pat.  We went to Eddie’s Attic twice with friends to enjoy some great music.  We ate Sushi, road our mountain bikes, played with the dogs and enjoyed a great time last night with our friends at the Aquarium.  I am never that socially active during the week, but this was definitely the week to do it.

A week like this certainly gives credence to the power of intention.  In fact, when I re-visited my 5 passions from my Passion Test experience with Wendy Watkins, I realized that I experience my passions right now, and more and more each day.  Below is the list that came out of the process and how I see me living them both this week and in my life in general.

1. Connected to My Source – I find that I may not be a yoga and meditation type of girl, but I definitely connect when I ride in the woods, listen to moving music, and write.  It was a great week for that.
2. Simple in Life Management – It is amazing how the right opportunities, flow, resources and people come into your life when you crave simplicity.  Organization comes easy too.
3. Connected to Pat – Simplicity has brought us more time together, opportunities to talk and work as a team.
4. Prosperity for What I Need, Want and Want to Give – Again, resources always come at the right time for what I need, what brings more enjoyment to my life, and for me to give to others – this comes in the form of money, time and assets that we share with others. We had several opportunities for that this week.
5. Working with Enjoyable and Inspiring People – The strategic partners who have come into my life are top-notch, as well as our service providers in the business, amazing clients and the opportunity to work with an absolutely incredible team at Paws, Whiskers and Wags.  They didn’t just come this week, but I slowed down and realized just how fortunate I am to have attracted such great people in my life.

Noticing an Amazing Week,

Bernadette

Are All New Realtionships the Best Use of Your Time?

Well, we know the answer is “no.”  But if you are a believer of synchronicity with the people you meet, you might be tempted to meet with everyone who asks.    Last week, I was introduced to four people via email by others whom I respect.  I noticed that over the years I had developed some criteria for who I would invest time to meet in person, those who I would schedule a call with, and those who I would decline a meeting, but try to help in some other way.   Qualified prospects will almost always warrant a meeting, but what about those elusive “gate-openers” who could be a gold mine relationship of great referrals and a synergistic partnership?  Ultimately, you’ve got to go with your gut, or sometimes even trust the gut of the person referring you.

Since I’m not always in tune with my gut,  I developed a process in my head.  So I wrote it down, mostly for a few colleagues who have struggled with saying “yes” too often.  And I decided to share it with you.

-          Are there synergies between the person’s type of business and mine?

Most of the time our business contacts tell us why they think we would be a good connection.  They will tie us together either with contacts we know  or reasons why our businesses could benefit one another.  There are those rare times when I am introduced to someone without a reason and I always ask the referring party what they noticed were the synergies between us just to make sure connecting is worth my time.

-          Do I already have a tight relationship with someone in that field?

If the relationship I have is mutually beneficially and makes me look good to my client, why would I start another relationship?  If the current relationships I have don’t run very deep, or if they haven’t been mutually beneficial, I might entertain new contacts and I go to the next question.

-          Do they have a website?  What does it look like?

If they don’t have one at all, it might be hard for me to introduce them to my clients.  A website is a sign of validation for a business.  Now, I am a firm believer that websites evolve over time as the business evolves and grows.  The site should reflect that.  You might want to connect with a solo entrepreneur because they would be more affordable than a big firm.  I evaluate the business through their site in the same way.  The most important criteria for me for a service provider partner, contractor or employee is this: do they have examples of their work on their site?  If they don’t, I can’t sell what they have to offer to my clients.

-          Do they have an email address associated with that website or do they use a gmail or yahoo account?

If they are still using gmail or yahoo instead of their URL, that is also a sign that may invalidate their commitment to their business.  I’m looking for a real URL.

-          Are they on LinkedIn?  Do they have more than 20 contacts they are connect to?  Have they ever been a part of Powercore, BNI or other close contact networking group?

Let’s me know that they know how to network effectively.  They have been through the “pay-it-forward” boot-camps of business and understand what it takes to build effective networking relationships.

-          How do they handle themselves on the first contact?

If they talk only about themselves in the email or on the phone, that is a bad sign.  If they take interest in me, my business, connections they might have for me, etc., the relationship could be more promising and mutually beneficial.

-          Are they a multi-level marketer?

If they are, I will certainly help connect them with people, but there’s no point in meeting with them.  Multi-level marketers love what they do and the are inevitably going to work on getting you to join their forces.  They just can’t help themselves.  I have found that they best way I can help a multi-level marketer is to introduce them to other multi-level markets via email.  They can create a more successful business if they have several lines of product to sell to consumers.  And none of them have an issue with MLM, so they don’t have that barrier to contend with.

This same criteria may not apply to everyone, but you might have found a nugget or two helpful.  And if you have any other tips, I would love to add them to my list.  I want to use my time wisely, but also be open to the possibilities.

Noticing a Process in Relationships,

Bernadette Peters

Adapting to communication to different relationships

Ever notice a business man in a restaurant who communicates with respect to his prospective client, but doesn’t treat the wait staff very well?  If you are reading this blog, you are probably in the camp of those of us who agree that’s not the kind of person you like spending a lot of time with.

That’s an extreme example, but it makes me wonder as a marketing professional if I tailor my message too much to different types of people.  I know it might be good for marketing, but how appropriate is it on a personal level?

My partner tends to have a potty mouth.  Our friends all love and accept her endearing f-bombs, but she employs a filter around young children.  That’s good tailoring.  Sometimes I have to ask her to filter herself around other people she may not know as well.

As business professionals, we can get so absorbed in business as our life that we carry business speak and strategies into our personal relationships.  A counselor probably has to work hard to keep from speaking when he sees a behavior in the family that requires “further exploration.”  A salesperson might have to curb her desire to convince her friends to embrace her ideas about what to do Friday night.

What bugs me is when I think I have a relationship with someone who doesn’t understand me as their audience.   It happens quite a bit in business where a client feels like they have to impress me by indicating that their business is going great.  Since we are there to help their business, I need to know the real story.  I understand maintaining that persona towards customers, but not a consultant.

Then there’s the challenge of being “misunderstood.”  That can happen sometimes with new acquaintances or new clients, but it should happen less often with family, close friends and long-term clients, right?  One would think.  With longer-term relationships, you have the benefit of a history with that person.  You should have a good understanding of their heart, values and intentions.

If my partner drops the ball on something I needed, I might be aggravated, but I know that she still loves me.  When something is awry in the office, I know my team well enough to recognize that it was probably an oversight, not dishonesty or blatant action. I know that although those individuals have issues in certain areas, honesty and good intentions are not included in the list of those things.

So what is the key to adapting communication to friends, colleagues, clients, neighbors, family?  I think part of it is taking the time to “notice” and know your audience.  Notice the trends who make them who they are.  What do you think?

Noticing Communication,
Bernadette

“We Don’t Act Like THAT In Decatur!”

You know what it’s like when you witness something appalling and you shout out something without thinking, but later you wish you said something with more impact, or something that was more clever?

We’ll I had a shout-out in the streets of Decatur tonight, and you know what?  It was PERFECT!  See, if you know anything about Decatur, it’s a special place – quite a blend of families, business people, hippies, students, eclectic homeless and some of the coolest senior citizen beer drinkers you’d ever want to meet.  Walking around Decatur is like the Volkswagon Bug commercial where someone sees it, feels good, does something nice for someone, then it causes a chain reaction of niceness.  Every city event has something for kids, and good beer as an integral part of the festivities.  And the police never have to worry because for the most part everyone is responsible, kind and friendly toward one another.

The thought of anyone shouting anything in the streets of downtown Decatur is a pretty foreign concept (except for Red, the Starbucks guitar player yelling hi to a buddy).  But tonight I did . . . twice!

I had just walked out of my new favorite place, The Yogurt Tap.  There were two cars getting ready to pull out of curb-side parking.  They were patient and working the neighborly order of things, awaiting pedestrians and some Thursday night traffic before they pulled out.  Then I was startled by the blast of a horn (also rare in Decatur) by the young guy on the other side of the street who was trying to do a u-ee and get one of those spots.  Evidently no one was moving fast enough for him.  He peeled out in his little civic through the light, then decided he would rather have turned to find another spot, so he threw his car in reverse to back through the light at a high speed.  Well, there was a pedestrian strolling through the crosswalk, unaware of the speeding civic.   I quickly reacted, and the first thing I yelled was “Watch Out!” . . . and the second I yelled was a booming, “We Don’t Act Like That in Decatur!”

My adrenalin was still pumping as I tried to see what foreign OTP county this guy came from.  But I was proud of myself.  My first reaction was hopefully impactful AND clever, but more than that, THE TRUTH!

As I drove down the street to go home, I pulled to a 4-way stop where the car on my right had the right of way.  She was waiting for a pedestrian to cross, so she smiled and waved me on through.  I smiled back and thought to myself, “THAT’s how we act in Decatur.”

This kind of “contrast” reminds me how much I appreciate where I live and the special people in my community!

Noticing How Awesome Decatur Is,

Bernadette