Noticing Aging – Lorne, Rose & Marge

We all have different views of aging and death – some shaped by our experiences with seniors, some by religious influence and some by just observing the community around us. One thing I know for sure is that nothing is certain and that life is too short to worry too much about it. So through the eyes of 3 people, I will ponder it for a moment.

Marge is 94 – she’s my grandmother and exactly 50 years older than me. She outlived my grandfather by far. She’s sharp and still mobile via her deluxe walker, but there’s a lot she can’t do for herself. Shakiness and the challenge of learning new things are her biggest hurdles, so she has to rely on others. She hates that, of course. She’s always been very independent, on-the-go and social. Although she has a glass of wine every day at happy hour, she sometimes comments that maybe she shouldn’t drink it because it makes her live longer. She’s outlived pretty much all of her friends and many of her siblings. Her close friends are younger and that helps, but she often wonders why she is still here.

Lorne was sixty something. He’s the dad of one of my best friends, and last year I had the privilege of mountain biking with Lorne and his three sons. Lorne pretty much out climbed us all. He lived in Evergreen, Colorado and mountain biked there practically every day. He was a lot of fun and full of life. Because he was healthy, active and lived a pretty low-stress life, I’m pretty sure he didn’t consider himself “old” and probably didn’t think much about his life ending anytime soon. But his life did just end. And my friend is still questioning, “why him?”, as we all are who knew Lorne.

Rose is 80. She lives across the street from the café and has entertained and inspired us ever since we met her. She’s led a cool life containing a variety of experiences, walks her dog “Sphinxy” several times a day and loves her new town of Sylva. This woman is amazing. She’s very positive and when you ask how she is, she mentions that she gets to live here another day. She had a cardiac event the other day and had to spend the night in the hospital. I was anxious to see her and when I did, she said that she’s ok with staying here or moving on to the “next thing,” meaning whatever comes after death.

Truth be told, I want to be like all of them. I want to live life to the fullest now without worry or fear. I want to enjoy my environment, people in my life and what does work in my body. I want to be ok with whatever comes today or tomorrow. I want to fix what is wrong and never give up, and when its my time – for changes in life or transition in life, I want to allow the best for me and for those I love. I might have 50+ years ahead of me or not much at all, but I’m thankful for today and what I get to experience in this moment.

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